My story (1)
When I was 4 yrs old, barely knowing what “newspapers” were, I found out what was on Page 3. I *never* liked my grandad after that, especially after I asked my grandmother and mother about the woman not wearing any clothes and why she was in something of Grandad’s. I still have no recollection of what either of them actually said in response, but I vividly remember the empathic feelings I felt as a 4 yr old doing as a 4 yr old does and watching their reactions including their body language very carefully.
It’s not what you say, it’s what you do after all. I remember I always felt awkward getting pocket money from him after that. I can’t tell you why. It felt like I was taking money from a bad man, a bad man who hurt mummy and grandma. So you could say it completely wrecked any relationship my grandfather could have hoped to have had with his grand-daughter. But growing up I also saw that my instincts in response to that occasion were more keen than I’d like because as I got older, I realised he really did treat my grandmother especially like she was only good for doing chores and looking after him.